Title:In Her Wake: A Child Psychiatrist Explores the Mystery of Her Mother’s Suicide
Author: Nancy Rappaport
Publisher: Basic Books
Publication Date: July 12, 2011
Paperback: 320 pages
ISBN: 978-0465022137
Genre: Memoir
From the Publisher:
In Her Wake is a rare thing: the story of a psychiatrist analyzing her own psychological drama. Nancy Rappaport was just four years old when her mother–a prominent Boston activist and socialite–committed suicide. Decades later, Rappaport, a child psychiatrist with three children of her own, pieced together a complex mosaic of her “mama.” In Her Wake sheds light on the nature of hurting and healing, and is a potent reminder that love outlasts death.
My Review:
In Her Wake: A Child Psychiatrist Explores the Mystery of Her Mother’s Suicide by Nancy Rappaport is a heartbreaking memoir that examines from personal, family and professional perspectives the decision of Rappaport’s mother to take her own life when the author was only a 4-year-old. I applaud Rappaport for taking on a topic that must have taken immense courage, especially under the circumstances of less-than-supportive siblings, as readers will learn. As a child psychologist, one might expect the author to have a very clinical viewpoint, but in what I think is a refreshingly unexpected approach, readers will witness the consequences of the tragedy from the author’s personal perspective. Though heartbreaking from the outset, Rappaport tells of her coping mechanisms and ultimately how she came to accept her past, understand the complexities of suicide, and how this all influences her as a mother of three. Readers will appreciate the depth of research and digging through family records that was necessary to piece together her own understanding of her mother and Rappaport offers resources for those dealing with suicide and other mental illnesses, making In Her Wake a work that educates as well as captivates. For discussion groups, I highly recommend In Her Wake for its unique perspective on the topic of suicide.
Nancy Rappaport is assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. She is attending child and adolescent psychiatry consultant to the Cambridge Public Schools and director of school-based programs in child psychiatry at the Cambridge Health Alliance. She lives in Cambridge, Massachusetts.
To learn more about author Nancy Rappaport, please visit her website.
For more reviews of the book, please follow the TLC Book Tour.
I received an arc of In Her Wake by Nancy Rappaport from TLC Book Tours to be a part of this tour and offer my honest review of the book. Receiving a complimentary copy in no way reflected my review of aforementioned book.
She certainly has the credentials to explore why her mother committed suicide. This is really a different angle. We’ve heard of or read about mothers committing suicide. I’ve never heard the story told from a Mental Health professional.
This was the first time I have read an account such as thins one, it was very informative and a very loving, if not sad memoir.
Thank you for your supportive review and encouragement for discussion/book groups. Questions that I would think could be interesting are about are there events/losses that may have happened with readers when they were a child that they may find they want to revisit as an adult to find out more? How does having a child/children change the need to identify or know more about your parents?
Nancy Rappaport
You are most welcome and those are wonderful discussion group questions, each requiring deep introspection.
This sounds does heartbreaking. Her mother must have been in immense pain to leave her family like that.
I cannot even imagine being in such pain.
You are so compassionate. I agree I always struggled in my darker moments writing this memoir and thinking about my mother and also treating patients who are suicidal with how much pain someone must be in to think that the only viable exit is suicide. Part of my hope in writing about my mother’s life and my process of healing from her suicide was to help people who are depressed to understand that they are loved and will be missed. When people are depressed they think they are expendable at times and many times people who have lost someone to suicide lament if only they had known how badly someone had felt and they wish they had a chance to reach out.
My life work has been to work with families and teenagers who may be
depressed and help them to find ways to cope.
I think of a wonderful poem by Galway Kinnel for inspiration written to a depressed suicidal friend
Wait
Wait for now
the Need for new love is faithfulness to the old.
Sincerely, Nancy
Sincerely,Nancy
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and such a beautiful poem. What surprises me, not in a good way, is how taboo talking about suicide still can be for many. Thank you for writing about this painful time in your life and for opening up the subject of suicide and offering excellent resources in your book.
I agree I was stunned by how many people have been touched by suicide which makes sense since 33 thousand people die a year..
Try walking around with my book and you will find that people will tell you heartbreaking stories.
The taboo part Is about the sense of what ifs that plague so many of those who have survived the loss. When you said it took courage for me to write this, in a way it was a force of will to put my mother to rest and also free me up to be a mother to my children without the “ghosts in the nursery”
One of the fascinating studies looks at how parents prior to having children talk about their own lives. It is not so much what has happened to them but how coherent their narrative that predicts many years later their attachment to their unborn children.
I am new to this technology so the response is out of order
Sincerely, Nancy
I imagine that book clubs would find a LOT to discuss in this one! Thanks for being on the tour.
Indeed it would be an excellent choice for discussion groups.